Things I won't miss about Vichy/ France

My how time flies when you're having fun. 4 months of studying in Vichy, France are now over and soon I’ll be headed home. 2 weeks and I’m back in Canada. 2 weeks and I don't have to say “why is that French woman wearing a fur coat?! It’s 25 degrees out!?!?” (NB: I admit I paraphrased that, but it legit happened). In honour of the end of my semester abroad, I shall now present you with a list of things that I will not miss about Vichy and France:

• Dog poop
• God-damned dirt bikes and scooters (to hell with thee heathens!!!!!!!!)
• Drunk Frenchmen singing their national anthem at midnight
• Loud Frenchmen
• Smelly Frenchmen
• French work hours (35 hour work week?! Seriously?!?!)
• The damn SNCF jingle. I. HATE. YOU. You are too damn perky. When my dang train is late and I’m tired and I want to go home I don't want to hear: da-du-DA-DU. No! Shut up! Go be a jingle somewhere else!!!
• French people making fun of English people because they don't speak French. Hello? I’m right here, I know what you’re saying, stupid. And just for that, I’m going to make fun of you, IN ENGLISH! MUAHAHHAHAHA!!!! No but seriously bro, you have to make sure I don't speak the language first.
• European room heaters. They. Don't. Work. Got it? Good.
• Always washing in hot water. This kind of ties in with the previous point. They wash in hot water all the time, they don't even have an option to wash in cold water. The coldest they have is 30 degrees. Their heaters are radiators (from what I understand...don’t judge me! I’m not a handy woman I don’t know these things!), which means they use hot water. This means that in combination with washing in hot water, they are costing themselves a shart-load in heating costs. You’re wasting money and energy is what I’m saying.....
• French people telling me that because I’m Canadian I should speak English AND French. Uhm, how about no?
• Having to cook/clean for myself. Dear sweet Jesus how I miss my mother’s cooking! How I miss a dishwasher! How I miss an oven and more than one burner to cook with! Gaah!! People, heed my words! Don’t ever take your mother or your kitchen for granted! Don't do it!